Collectively, we get angry about hate speech particularly that which is specific to color, gender or sexual orientation, etc.  We even confront those who do it.  Although they are just words, it’s the intent we take issue with…rightly so.  We know words are used as weapons.

In our LGBT world using words like “dyke” or “fag” are amongst those.

Then there’s the other three letter “F” word:  FAT

“Fat” is used with hate, spite, venom and intent to malign even those who are not fat.  It’s used, like so many other epithets, to put people in their place (i.e. – you are less than a fully formed human being with a range of experiences, thoughts, ideas and emotions).  Feel better now?  Most troubling when said by those who’ve experienced some form of hate speech.  I’ve heard people who consider themselves to be most “PC” use “fat” as a weapon.

When not being vilified, we are invisible or not deserving of any dignity.  You don’t want us on television, in the movies, in your promotional photos, working for you or sitting next to you.  You say, “I am just thinking of your health.”  Really, because it seems that you are just saying that I am not aesthetically pleasing to YOU.  The dirty look you just shot me had nothing to do with my “health.”  That was a look of disgust and/or hate!  Yes, I saw it.

Yes, I am fat.

A FEW THOUGHTS ON WHAT THIS MEANS FOR ME:

I am NOT unintelligent or stupid
I am NOT lazy
I am NOT jolly
I do NOT deserve pity
I do NOT smell bad
I am NOT a terrible employee/worker
I do NOT only eat fast food
I am NOT unattractive
I am NOT emotionally unstable

In fact I AM very smart, more hard working than most, funny as hell, smell fabulous, am the “go to” person in the workplace, rarely eat fast food, adorable as hell,  am emotionally stable and am so much more!  I have a heart of gold and am a great person to know!  Yes, I am still fat!  I am also not alone in this!

Though always told I was fat, I’ve seen the photos, um, no, I wasn’t.  Sadly, I didn’t know that at the time.  My mother put me on diets at age 6 (smart move for my metabolism).  Now I am fat which describes one aspect of me.  It sucks when you say it as a means to hurt, demean or otherwise malign someone.

In my college Women’s Studies class there was one sentence uttered by a woman (self-described adamant feminist who was 20+ years older than me) burns in my memory as her lack of true feminism appeared.  She described women as “ranging from anorexic to butt ugly.”  So much for feminist notion of equality for ALL women as it seems to be reserved for those who are thin. “Anorexic” was just a description, but “fat” gets the judgment of being “butt ugly.”  Sadly, the only change is that it seems worse than ever!

Next time you want to say “fat” about another or even yourself, please consider the intent.  Is it an accurate description or are you trying to be hurtful?  Deep down I trust you know the difference and the power of language. We all want to be healthy, but size is not the predictor you think it is.  People, fat or thin, can and do have health issues just don’t assume you know based on size.

Yes, I am passionate about diversity and inclusion for all.  Finally, I recently read a new book about sex & size which is amazing.  I encourage EVERYONE to read “Fat Sex: The Naked Truth” by Rebecca Jane Weinstein.  It’s a real page turner regardless of your size, gender or sexual orientation.

Carrie Avritt, an emerging comedian from San Francisco, is funny. Although she has wanted to perform standup her whole life, Carrie did not start until 2011 after writing material for some time.  In the last year Carrie has performed open mic nights, showcases, performed with bands, private events, Pride events, and been a special guest comedian for Chris Franjola, DL Hughley as well as Loni Love, all nationally known comedians. Carrie brings with her a unique brand of edgy observational humor.

Check out her performance dates on her facebook page and twitter account.  www.facebook.com/carrie4comedy and @carrie4comedy on twitter.