Kim Baker // Posts published by Kim Baker
5 Tips For Meeting Your Girlfriend’s Family
On the list of things people fear the most, I’m told public speaking sits at the top. This time of year makes me wonder if meeting the parents is number three or four on the top fears list. What if her family isn’t okay with the gay thing? What if her family finally accepted it, […]
3 Pillars of Healthy Lesbian Relationships
In past relationships, there was always a moment when I knew it was over. In one particularly volatile relationship, many odd things happened over time that didn’t feel quite right – secrecy, aggression, and pulling me in and pushing me away. But it was one rather benign instant when I knew. I don’t recall the […]
Lesbian Dating: Watch for these 3 Wake-Up Calls
I am sitting in stopped traffic, headed home from the airport following a whirlwind work trip that left me defeated. Knee bouncing impatiently up and down, I replay the toxic trip, for my toxic employer as I sit at stopped train tracks. Finally, the gates open and I inch my way up to the stop […]
3 Reasons to Take a Relaxed Approach to Dating
I kneel down and fasten the timing chip neatly to my running shoe, stand up and take in the pack of runners around me. Hands on my hips, I take a breath. It occurs to me that I’m about to run 13.1 miles and I may not be sufficiently trained. As I stretch, I recall […]
3 Ways Lesbians Ignore ‘Red Flags’ When Dating
“I have appreciated your friendship, but don’t think I can be friends anymore.â€Â My directness, combined with my odd word choice surprises me, even as I hear myself speaking them aloud to a friend (now formerly known as). We part on civil terms and I’m proud of our adult-like recognition that this friendship isn’t working anymore. […]
Lesbian Dating: 3 Signs of Emotional Abuse
I am sitting on my office floor, old journals and photos spread around me. For the past hour, I have been reading my diaries from two decades ago to remind me of who I am and perhaps to provide a little perspective. As I sip wine and read about the events and feelings of my […]
3 Reasons Lesbians Choose Unavailable Women
Why are lesbians so often drawn to vaguely disinterested women? I am biting my lip, surrounded by UConn fans in a packed basketball stadium. I find myself watching the women’s basketball final four amidst thousands of other fans in the city I used to call home. As I watch on in angst as my dear […]
Five Red Flags in Lesbian Relationships
I am sitting across the table over wine with friends as we discuss how to know when a relationship is over. We share stories of staying too long in relationships when we didn’t know how to know the difference between normal relationship problems, and problems that indicate it’s over. I find myself joking, “Someone should […]
Mindful Self Responsibility in Lesbian Dating
I pull into the parking lot in front of the bar one Saturday night. Rain floods the lot, leaving an inch of standing water everywhere. I put the car in park, leaving the engine running. Windshield wipers going crazy, I sit for a moment, peering out of the drenched, fogged-up glass toward the bar entrance. […]
A Lesbian Breakup Makeover
For the past hour, I have been sitting on my wood floor, legs splayed about to make room for the bookcase pieces I’m attempting to combine. I stare numbly at the half-put together jumble of particleboard and Swedish instructions in front of me, realizing that half the shelves are facing forward, and half are facing […]
What's InsideA lesbian smorgasbord
Hang on, it's going to be a wild ride!
Robin
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