lesbian sex advice // Posts tagged as "lesbian sex advice"
Is Having Sex Really That Important?
In my personal quest to affirm sexual intimacy for lesbian couples, I keep hearing “Why?†If two women aren’t having sex, and both are okay with that, why is there a problem? Maybe sex just isn’t that important to them. Well, yes, if this were true, it would be true. There is no rule that […]
Ask A Battleaxe: Should I Shave…Everything?
Dear Battleaxe, I’m dating someone who I haven’t had sex with yet. But I think we are about to—any day now. The problem is, she wants me to shave my pussy because she is hair-phobic. Should I do it? Or maybe just trim the front? Dear ‘Business in front— party in back’, Sounds like a […]
How Do I Stop Fantasizing about Her?
My first thought is “Why should you?†What’s wrong with indulging in fantasies for an unavailable woman? After all, that’s how romantic relationships start, with that lovely combination of attraction, desire to be close, and poignant longing. This wonderful  woman seems to embody love and passion. In the beginning, she’s a fantasy, and it’s like […]
Keeping Sex Alive in Lesbian Relationships
Dear Dr. Glenda: My partner and I are arguing a lot about our sex life. We don’t really have one, except maybe a couple times in the past year. She thinks we should work on this, but when I talk to my friends they aren’t having much sex either. Sex has never been that big […]
Is it Anti-Feminist for a Lesbian to Initiate Sex?
What’s a very common refrain you hear when you ask a lesbian about her sex life? “Once we get started, I love it!†Actually, you hear a version of that about a lot of things, not just sex. “I didn’t want to go to that party, but once I got there I had a great […]
I’m Just Not Attracted to You
Here’s something that doesn’t need to be said:  I’m just not attracted to you. Recently “Sally & Sue†came in to talk because they hadn’t had sex in several months. Sally was very upset about it. She missed the warmth and intimacy of their early relationship, but was afraid that Sue had shut down permanently. […]
Let’s Talk about Sex and Orgasms
One morning in my office a woman told me her biggest fear about beginning to date again was about sex; specifically, how to deal with the fact that orgasm had been so difficult with her last partner, and she just didn’t want to go through that again. That afternoon, another woman told me that she’d […]
Are You Ready for Love?
Lately “I’m not ready yet†has been coming up a lot. I’ve heard it–and said it myself-many times, and of course it usually makes sense. Everyone need time to let wounds heal, get re-oriented to new situations, settle in after upheavals. But when does “healing†become “hiding out?†How do you discern what’s truly in […]
Positive Body Image Leads to Better Sex
I often ask women to rank the most negative influences on their sexual relationship.  Over half of the time, “negative body image†heads the list.  We’re so trained to stand outside ourselves, judging our bodies–but to enjoy sex we need to enjoy how our bodies feel, not how they look.  So how do you make […]
Lesbian Sex: How The Truth Can Set You Free
When I was a teenager a booklet mysteriously appeared on a book shelf in the family room. It was called, curiously enough,  What Teenagers Need To Know about Sex. I immediately sneaked it upstairs and read it from cover to cover. Then I sneaked it back onto the shelf. It took me years to realize […]
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